Is f*****g drunk....

...and will probably regret this tomorrow. But then, what's life without some regrets, eh? I have been so controlled, so fucking politically correct, so "good girl" that its giving me a solid case of identity crisis. I am not used to keeping my mouth shut...or having conversations inside my head, which is pretty much what I have been doing.

I can be SUCH an arsehole. People who matter, I ignore and others.... well, I behave like one of those silly dogs that will wag their tail and be friendly with everyone. the hungry for affection sorts.

Once, when passing through this colony -- my regular route -- I saw this pomeranian that was tied to the balcony railing with a rope. Not much area to move, not much to do anything. That bloody dog used to bark --- that irritating pomeranian bark -- at everyone. I used to think that dog was really nasty. Then one day -- and on more days frequently -- I saw the dog's owner belt it. Really belt it. The dog wouldn't yowl, it would just whimper while the belt -- and sometimes a slipper or a boot -- made its fur come out in tufts.

At other times, I saw the same owner really hug and pet the dog. The dog would have its tail between its legs while his master stroked him. The dog was always expecting another beating. Even when his master was cooing to him.

Sometimes, I hate feeling like that pomeranian. Some of us, you know, it's better for some of us to realise that we are meant to be pomeranians. Not labradors that are supposed to be the most people-friendly dogs. I think I am a pomeranian.

Did I ever tell you that at one point in my history I had 14 dogs in my house? Majority pomeranians. Hah. Should have known then, but what to do? I was a mere 6-yeard-old then... Papa was posted in Agra then. On Prithviraj road.
The street was known for robberies. The burglars thought that people who had dogs were rich...they were using dogs to protect their riches.

haha. My mother had me and a new born baby...and a plaster on her right leg. Osteomalitis. Her bone marrow dried on the right leg shin, that piece of bone was removed. Poor Ma. And 14 dogs to look after... Papa didn't help. Someday I shall ask him about it...

Now....my parents have NOT told me about uit.....but Ma has heart problems. My bro told me...my parents think i dont know... hah. They always try to 'protect' me... whatn good has it done Ma-Pa? when did you eever succeed in that???

So now they are waiting for further ECG tests...all the while assuring me that everyything is all right. Oh. I am NOT a fucking child. Thankfully, Papa knows that I use "fuck" a lot.

Haha. He was quite disappointed when he had discovered my new, improved vocabulary.

Ok Never mind. it's now getting progferssively harder to speell. so ishall desist.

we shall end with quote of the day: "If you leave your dog for a man, it nwill always come back to bite you."



Anonymous said...

Have really missed the regular updates!


maxine said...

you grew up in between 14 dogs??how bout cats?I wish i knew how to handle dogs,now that when i see my daughter 'inherit' the fear :(

Parents: well...as they age we do have to go through the time of watching them get labelled with some kind of disease.I've gone through the phase a bit early since mine married late.Yday my dad couldnt remember my name :)
Make them feel loved.

What did you drink?

Eveline said...

.... And I'll drink to that! Well said sister. :P

I grew up with a lot of dogs and i've always been happy that they've grown up to be as wild as i am. Hope you get some good news on the test results. Stay strong!


Kartikey said...

I too get these 'visions' of lanes in Hyderabad, where my late grandfather would walk. And a dog would bark continuously and scare him. Then he died. And I was never even...

By the way, my presence now sorted?

Jhoomur aka JB said...

Pugsie: :) hello...been a while eh?

Maxine: if you can manage it, get yourself and the daughter a puppy..once you have it growing with you, slowly the fear would lessen. Parents being labelled with a disease... so true. It's nice you can smile about it; I had been freaking out.

Kartikey: The fault is mine. I disappear and then when i write and you guys comment, I go, "oh hello who are you?" its silly. good to see you here though. I am sorry about your grandfather...sometimes not knowing hurts more. But guess they --when we are far away -- dont want us to worry about them.

Eveline: Must have been your good wishes. Bro called at 2 am oz time and informed that all Ma's tests were negative. She's hale and hearty, literally. Apparently she was anxious...

Do you have any dogs now?

maxine said...

oh, good to know about the results.

Eveline said...

Awesome! Nice to hear your mum's in the pink of health.

Oh yeah... i have one dog now. A short little fella. He looks like a puppy but he's about 4 yrs old. We got him from the streets when he was as small as a rat. Helpless little thing fit right into my palm. Love him to bits.
Have a great weekend, Eve. :)

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